Tuesday, 26 August 2008

Wheels on the Bus

This Bank Holiday Weekend was incredible. Friends, a wonderful attentive and sexually diverse lover, cool events and 8 old mates ALL sleeping in my room - all combined into a sea of drunkness and adventure. It was certainly a spontaneous one, but one to remember.

There was, however, ONE incident that seemed to fester at the back of my mind for the most part of it. The 176 bus is never a place I like to visit willingly - lack of money generally decides that for me. But in any case, I was venturing past the borders of Dulwich when this young black fresh-faced girl with a green top, who couldnt have been more than 15, walks up the top deck aisle, and stares at me with unflinching intimidation until she reaches her seat, RIGHT behind me. I could pratically feel her breath down my neck.

Shouting on her phone louder than Foghorn Leghorn, she relentlessly blurted into her handset with an overbearing South East accent various aspects of her non-eventful day. My boyfriend sat next to me, with the right idea of putting his headphones in, to drown out the noise. The girl then decided to tell her friend all about ME. My mouth dropped and my fists shook as she ripped into me, so LOUD that everybody on the fucking top deck could hear clearly:

"Right yeh - hear 'dis. There's a gal sat 'ere RIGHT infront of me, right, and she's well fucked up. She's got like 4 earrings in her ears yeah, some dutty dreads and some fucked up hairstyle, her fringe is like well fucked- she's got these NASTY tattoo's all over her - she's DISGUSTING. Its making me SICK.... YEAH, innit doh? Shes a fucking DISGRACE."

I looked at my boyfriend, who was oblivious to the better part of this bitch's outburst, and I got up, stormed down the top deck aisle, and shot the cunt a dirty look as I walked down the stairs facing her. I COULDNT BELIEVE IT.

As a woman who is alternative, queer and flamboyantly dressed, I am used to the odd comment, funny look, double take and even shouted sentence from passers by. I choose to ignore them, knowing that when I chose my style and decided to stretch my ears etc, it was a decision I made along with all of the social consequences. I am NOT USED to people like that little bitch shouting words like 'disgraceful' and 'disgusting' to an entire audience, simply over how I choose to appear. The only reason I didnt turn around to punch her and knock some sense into her ignorant head is because she probably has a willing gang of knife wielding bastards who would hunt my distinctive self down in a second once I'd banged her up. I also hate violence, and try to avoid confrontation whenever possible, so for her to make me feel like that took A LOT of aggravation on her part.

My boyfriend did a really good job of holding me and telling me that her life was obviously so meaningless and boring that she felt the need to go around making other people's lives a misery as a form on entertainment, and that her mother must be proud that she dragged up such a little runt. However - I cant help but still feel those comments burn in the back of my mind. It doesnt help when somebody such as myself already has confidence issues.

I hope that one day that young girl throws offence like that to somebody else, in another part of London, and they give her what for because they dont take ANY shit, or that theyre not as strong as me for holding back. I'd like to see her face when she realises what reactions some people CAN have, and hopefully somebody will teach her a lesson.

It makes me sad how young people can live like this on a day to day basis.


goregoregirl said...

hmmm, a similar thing happened to Doug on the 176. i wonder if it was the same girl...

Steph said...

You've got a hell of a lot of self control for not decking the shit out of her. And yea, your bf is right - she's the one with the issues!

PS - thanks for letting me read all of this.